just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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