it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
