I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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