Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
you never un-have a 4some
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
