Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
NoShamevember. You game?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
