We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
That was an excessively violent trivia night
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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