Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
