I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
