I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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