I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
