Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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