we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Randomize
