i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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