I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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