never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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