I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
