fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
they're like a gay fantastic four
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
