I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
