Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
