like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
