Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
