The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
