I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
