So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
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