its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You ate ashes out of my bong
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
