Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You brought string cheese to the strip club
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
