Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Do you still have your period?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
