Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
