I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
