piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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