we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize