I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
