Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
