let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
We need to rekindle our bromance
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
