Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
