Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
