So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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