Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I love having hate sex.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize