She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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