I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize