Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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