it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
my liver is dry heaving
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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