I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
