i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just found a bag of teeth...
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
