You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
