i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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