everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize