Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
