bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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