Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
