For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize