Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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